Finding a doctor.

You wouldn't drive your car for 10 years and never take it in for service/to see a mechanic, would you?  Why would you do that to your body?  I know why I did it, I didn't like any of the doctors I had seen so I never went back to them.  Now I realize it was a stupid thing to do, regular check ups are just as important as exercise and a good diet.  They help to catch problems before they balloon into large issues and they help keep your body in top shape.

Finding a doctor is always hard for me.  The first hurdle is me.  I admit it, I don't like most people and I have to like and respect my doctor before I can talk to him about what's going on with me.  Frankly, I also don't like being touched by people I don't know.  It's icky.  It's kind of hard for a doctor to examine you if you don't want them to touch you and it's hard for you to listen to what they are saying when you're staring at them and thinking how much you dislike them.

The second problem was my weight.  It was VERY hard to find a doctor that doesn't take one look and write off all your problems to fatness.  Yes, it may be a contributing factor (or a cause) but I resent the attitude of "Go home and get skinny, if there is anything wrong after that we'll look into it."  I've gotten a LOT of that over the years and it makes you pretty damn doctor shy.  The other pet peeve of mine is the doctor who at first glance prescribes bariatric surgery. That's a band aid, not a solution.  I got to this weight once, I'll do it again if I don't know how/why I got here. Don't get me started on how I feel about our education system and how it's NOT teaching us proper nutrition.

I was ...ok... with my doctor in NJ.  He was a nice little man, but a very very nervous little guy.  He always seemed like a timid mouse to me, which might be why I never felt intimidated by him.

Here in Oregon I've tried 2 different ones and didn't like either of them.  When I was admited to the ER in March I didn't have a primary care physician and dealt with whomever was on call.  I saw at least 5 different doctors and one morning about 4 of them showed up in my room.  One was the head doctor guy at the hospital and I REALLY didn't like him.  He just exuded a 'putz vibe'.  He talked to me about moving out of ICU and I'd be in a regular room for a few days until rehab (or home) but that I would need to find a primary care physician for follow up care.  I kind of thought he meant "right now!" so I scoped out the other 3 that were with him.  Two were ok, but seemed kind of aloof and I didn't care for any of them.  The 3rd I had seen most often and he seemed really nice.  He wasn't pushy or judgemental and had a very calming sense about him. While I was in ICU that was really appreciated so I pointed at him.  They all cracked up so I guess they weren't expecting me to choose right that second.

Shortly after I had chose him as my primary he came in to talk to me and pulled up a chair in ICU.  He talked about my blood pressure and let me know that my blood sugar was off the charts and asked if I knew what caused diabetes.  I told him that I wasn't surprised and that I knew I needed to lose weight and that my diet was terrible.  I let him know that I had been thinking a LOT about that the past few days in ICU.  He looks surprised and was very candid but gentle. He was NOT judgmental and offputting as most of the other doctors I had ever seen were.  We talked about nutrition and he kept repeating that I didn't need to "DIET"... that I needed to start eating lots of leafy greens, control my carbs, cut out sugar and lower my sodium.  He stressed that it was not a "diet", but that I needed to change the way I ate for health and that losing weight would be a side effect.

My first visit out of hospital we repeated that same talk again and he asked if I thought I could handle a change in lifestyle.  My response was "Do I have any choice?"  He looked taken back and responded that I really didn't. We talked about my next visit and how much weight he thought I could lose by it.  I was REALLY excited about the next visit because I nailed the amount we discussed.  I don't know who seemed more excited while the nurse weighed me in, I think it might have been him.  I had found out from the nurse that he had contacted my physical therapist and tracked my progress, I really liked that he took interest enough to follow up on that to make sure I was doing well.  He was excited that I had abandoned my cane and was walking normally.  I took 2 months of food logs with me, and I expected him to glance at them half heartedly but he read them.  Every. Single. Page.   He was happy with what I was eating, was happy with the log and liked that I tracked my BP twice a day.  I had FINALLY found an encouraging and enthusiastic doctor who seemed to really care and was excited about my getting better.

So, that's how I wound up with my doctor.  I've been to his office at least 4 or 5 times now since I got out of the hospital and I like him more and more.  He is a resident, so he's young and he's learning.  That's ok with me though.  As I told him a few visits back, I'm learning too and we'll figure it out together.  As a resident he doesn't have all the answers and I like that.  I like that he doesn't give me a quick response (even if he has no idea) and move on.  If he isn't 100% sure he TELLS me that and researches the answer.  I knew I had a winner when I got a call from him one night at about 9:30 in the evening answering a question I had asked him the day before during a visit.  9:30 at night and he was working on my question?  You're a good man, Charlie Brown.  Either that or you really need a life, either way he seems to care and it shows.

OK, all my talk makes it seem like a serious crush on Doctor McHotpants.  Yes, I admit he's attractive,but I genuinley like the guy.  He cares, he's not judgemental, and he's a nice guy in general. I learned an important lesson, just because 1 or 2 or 10 doctors were a putz doesn't mean they all are.  Your health is too important to give up on finding a doctor because of a few bad apples.  So go to 1 or 2 or 20 doctors until you find ONE that you like.  Your health is worth it and so are you.